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Saturday, 7 February 2009

Smallville Season 8 - A Little Rant

WARNING: MAJOR PLOT SPOILERS. DO NOT READ ON IF YOU HAVEN'T WATCHED THE LATEST US EPISODES!


OK so it's obvious I love Smallville (it is Superman after all) but I am severely p****d at the recent Lana storyline the writers have created over the last few episodes.

Lana never meant to leave Clark for all that time, she was forced to by Mercy (under Lex's orders) and once she'd fled Lex's evil clutches she got some hardcore military style training that made her hard-ass and ready for anything. She hunts down Lex's latest tech that will help him live (a nano skin of alien cells that would also give him Superman like powers that they call a suit of armour) and gets the Doc to put it on her instead of Lex (the 'birth' of the new Lana where she smashes through the glass and grabs the bullet in 'speedy time' is pretty cool I must admit).
She can never remove this thing so it looks as if Lana and Clark will be a super powered duo and be fully compatible lovers forever (being able to now hump without incident again too). But (and it's a big but) low and behold there's a chink in the armour... Lex developed it to absorb any Kryptonite it comes into contact with (to obviously kill Clark) and Lex, together with Toyman, build a Kryptonite bomb that only Lana can diffuse... By absorbing all of the Kryptonite, finally sealing the Lana/ Clark, will they/ won't they, question forever. Lana is now lethal to Clark and they can never be together again. They can't even get within 10 feet of each other or else Clark will get sick.
Lana with her new powers moving in 'speedy-time' (hence the aura).

Lana having to absorb the Kryptonite from the rooftop bomb to save the inhabitants of Metropolis while destroying hers and Clarks relationship...


What a frickin cop out... Whoever wrote that bloody storyline should be shot. Fine, I understand that Clark has to get with Lois for the Superman continuity to look like it's actually getting to where it's going sometime soon, but it's all a total crock of s**t to do what they've done.

Plus did Saturn Girl not tell Lana that she had (and will have) a huge influence on Clark's life and that she does a huge amount of good herself? So I gather they meant an influence in retrospect, seeing as that's the end of them (or is it, you can never be sure with these two?) and she'll become her own superhero in some other city somewhere, fighting crime... If so it's obviously a new hero we've never heard of in the DC continuity and has been created purely to get Lana out of the picture.
Oh and Lex is now definitely dead? Do they not think we know our Supes history? Lex Luthor is alive and well when Clark becomes Superman and sets about saving Metropolis for the rest of his days so what's the point in pretending they've offed Lex again? He's Superman's greatest nemesis!!! Just because the new actor didn't look or sound anything like Michael Rosenbaum now that he's off doing more cartoon voice acting? Obviously the producers and writers have finally decided to get rid of the two characters that have really kept Smallville in the minor leagues for the last few seasons, and I don't disagree, I just don't like then way in which they've executed their respective departures.

Anyways, if season 9 is going ahead we need to now clean Lana off the Smallville slate, defeat the mostly absent Doomsday and get some serious Lois and Clark action going this season. I want more Lois (God do I want more Lois!), more DC heroes and villains and some flying Clark before it's all too late. Oh and Bruce Wayne/ Batman better be a season 9 addition or I'll hunt them down and beat them all with a random Superman collectible from my room, believe me there's enough here for each to get there own!!!

Rant over, carry on as you were...

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